I haven't made a list in a while and I'm on a trip with my wife, so no ministry posts for a while. I did make a statement on Sunday that sparked a need for a list though. I said that in my opinion, Aslan, from the Chronicles of Narnia series, was the finest literary fictional character. Here's a list of the top five.
1. Aslan -- The Chronicles of Narnia by C.S. Lewis
Anthropomorphism (giving human characteristics to any animal or object) isn't the right niche for Aslan. He goes way beyond that -- it's actually the other way around. The lion speaks to the humanity in this regard. In the obvious allegory of the Narnia series, Aslan is Jesus and the ferocity, anger, resolve and wrath of the Aslan is perfecly balanced by his gentleness, kindness and meekness. He is the picture of the marriage between the Jesus seen in Revelation and the Jesus seen in John.
"'Safe?' said Mr. Beaver...'Who said anything about safe? 'Course he isn't safe, but he's good. He's the King, I tell you.'" -- Mr. Beaver, speaking of Aslan
2. Kerbouchard -- The Walking Drum by Louis L'Amour
"The name has a ring to it!" Scoff if you will at this creator of wild west tales of chilvalry and justice, The Walking Drum is quality literature. Set in middle ages Europe and the Middle East, Kerbouchard, a Celt by birth, wanderer of the world and seeker of his father's justice lives an adventure that takes him from slave on a ship to adviser to kings. War, intrigue, romance, betrayal, friendship -- all are inherent in the Kerbouchard's DNA and story. But more than anything, he is a learner, a seeker of truth, always learning and never arriving. It was Kerbouchard who sparked my interest in classic literature and sold me on reading and adventure. A man's man.
"It has seemed to me that each year one should pause to take stock of himself, to ask: Where am I going? What am I becoming? What do I wish to do and become? Most people whom I have encountered were without purpose, people who had given themselves no goal. The first goal need not be the final one, for a sailing ship sails first by one wind, then another. The point is that it is always going somewhere, proceeding towards a final destination." -- Kerbouchard
3. Billy Colman -- Where The Red Fern Grows by Wilson Rawls
I first read this book when I was ten or eleven. I think it was the first classic piece of literature I ever read and the first book I ever cried about. Billy is a the main character of the story -- a complex yet simple boy with an insatiable desire for adventure growing up in the Ozark mountains. He wants to be a coon hunter, so he works and saves for two years to buy two hound dogs, Old Dan and Little Ann and they become a champion coon hunting team. Living all kinds of adventures together, the story ends with the death of the Old Dan and Little Ann protecting Billy from a mountain lion ("devil cat of the Ozarks"). Billy had heart and guts. He chopped down a huge tree in order to get a coon out of it and win his dogs' trust. So I got my grandad's axe, headed out into the woods and began chopping down a ridiculous tree. Took me five days to fell it -- but I wasn't about to not be like Billy. Heart and guts.
"Lying back in the soft hay, I folded my hands behind my head, closed my eyes, and let my mind wander back over the two long years. I thought of the fishermen, the blackberry patches, and the huckleberry hills. I thought of the prayer I had said when I asked God to help me get two hound pups. I knew He had surely helped, for He had given me the heart, courage, and determination." -- Billy
4. Gandalf -- The Lord Of The Rings Series by J.R.R. Tolkien
Power. Wisdom. Humility. Shadowfax. Establisher of kings. Leadership. Sight. Forward-thinking. Glamdring. Stubborn. Re-born. All things I deeply long for. At this point in my life, Gandalf is who I long to be.
"I threw down my Enemy and he fell from his high place and broke the mountain-side where he smote it in his ruin." -- Gandalf
5. Josephine "Jo" March -- Little Women by Louisa May Alcott
Let me say right off the get-go here, that every movie made about this book is horrible. Do not watch the movies, read the books. It is not a primer on feminism, it is a primer on relationships, priorities and beauty. Alcott is a relational genius when it comes to writing. I loved the book Little Women when I had to read it for an English assignment in high school. I didn't have the guts to say so at the time, but I've read it three or four times. And in doing so, I developed a major crush on Jo. Without knowing it, Jo became my picture of the perfect girl, and eventually the perfect wife. She was not even close to perfect, but she embraced life, love, heart, and imagination with beauty and enthusiastic grace. And I definitely married a Jo. Sheri is all of those things, but obviously without the fictional twist. The confident beauty and grace with which she embraces life is a dream come true for me. I can't believe she's mine.
"Wouldn't it be fun if all the castles in the air which we make could come true and we could live in them?" -- Jo
Wednesday, May 16, 2007
Friday, April 13, 2007
The Abyss
I'm starting in on Revelation next week. These pics have everything to do with the abyss, which have everything to do with Revelation.
Thursday, April 12, 2007
Key Principles Part One
At Cornerstone, we've been speaking lately of three key principles. The first is: Obedience is the doorway to intimacy.
What goes on between us and God is a relationship and there are certain things that are true in that relationship because of the parties involved. God is God and worthy of worship because He is God and He is capable and right in telling me to do whatever it is He would like to that is in line with His character. I am a receiver of unconditional, underserved love and grace and have been redeemed and placed in Christ and named a son of God and co-heir with Christ -- a prisoner set free indeed. My identity has been changed from an enemy of God to a friend of God, I am made completely new.
And God is still God. Never changing, unshakable, the same today that He has been since eternity past. I am His son. He is Father. What He says is motivated by Father-love I obey because I am His Son. It is my identity to obey.
Too many Christians obey God so that they may feel significance. The idea is that if I pick myself up by my bootstraps and obey God, then I feel good about myself -- and what's more -- I look good to those around me. This makes me feel important and more acceptable to God. And on the darkest but truest level, I believe I am worthy of God's love. I offer these steps of obedience to God and actually expect Him to step into a relational contract. I obey, He loves. It gets darker when the contract reads, I obey, He blesses.
The reason why this is so dark is because it robs God of the true depth of his goodness and love. On some level, my obedience is my offering to God and His return to me is love, blessing -- significance.
The point of John 15 is that an apple tree bears apples because it's an apple tree, not because it works hard. The tree's job is to be a tree, God bears fruit. I obey God because it's my identity, not because it buys me significance or standing with Him. He loves me, Billy Graham, Martin Luther, Britney Spears and Donovan McNabb with the same level of love and passion. A love and passion deep enough to sacrifice His Son. I am significant because God loves me and I am His, not because I obey well.
Next post: Obedience is the doorway to intimacy. Obedience is not intimacy.
What goes on between us and God is a relationship and there are certain things that are true in that relationship because of the parties involved. God is God and worthy of worship because He is God and He is capable and right in telling me to do whatever it is He would like to that is in line with His character. I am a receiver of unconditional, underserved love and grace and have been redeemed and placed in Christ and named a son of God and co-heir with Christ -- a prisoner set free indeed. My identity has been changed from an enemy of God to a friend of God, I am made completely new.
And God is still God. Never changing, unshakable, the same today that He has been since eternity past. I am His son. He is Father. What He says is motivated by Father-love I obey because I am His Son. It is my identity to obey.
Too many Christians obey God so that they may feel significance. The idea is that if I pick myself up by my bootstraps and obey God, then I feel good about myself -- and what's more -- I look good to those around me. This makes me feel important and more acceptable to God. And on the darkest but truest level, I believe I am worthy of God's love. I offer these steps of obedience to God and actually expect Him to step into a relational contract. I obey, He loves. It gets darker when the contract reads, I obey, He blesses.
The reason why this is so dark is because it robs God of the true depth of his goodness and love. On some level, my obedience is my offering to God and His return to me is love, blessing -- significance.
The point of John 15 is that an apple tree bears apples because it's an apple tree, not because it works hard. The tree's job is to be a tree, God bears fruit. I obey God because it's my identity, not because it buys me significance or standing with Him. He loves me, Billy Graham, Martin Luther, Britney Spears and Donovan McNabb with the same level of love and passion. A love and passion deep enough to sacrifice His Son. I am significant because God loves me and I am His, not because I obey well.
Next post: Obedience is the doorway to intimacy. Obedience is not intimacy.
Tuesday, March 20, 2007
I'm Back And I'm 30
It's been a while.
I turned 30 on February 27. To me, 30 was always the threshold of "old". Somewhere, probably in a box in my parent's basement is a list of things I would like have done before I turned 30. I wish I had that list. I made it when I was around 15 and I can remember a few things on it:
1. Get married (accomplished)
2. Travel to Europe (accomplished)
3. Play semi-pro soccer (not accomplished)
4. Be a missionary in a Muslim country (not accomplished, my wife was though)
5. Learn guitar (accomplished)
6. Skydive (not accomplished)
7. Run a business (accomplished)
8. Be published (accomplished)
9. I'm pretty sure that "Meet Alyssa Milano" was on there too (not accomplished)
I realize that the amount of change that has happened in the last fifteen years is hard to fathom. Heck, the amount of change in me in the last six months is hard to fathom. I think that the only thing I am going to put on my list of things to accomplish before I am 40 is to keep changing. One of the major things I've learned is that there is always more to press into, particularly in my relationship with Jesus, Sheri, my kids, my friends and my church. It's a constant changing, a constant moving. Satisfaction is not an option. Stagnation is unacceptable. Resting in Jesus is important, but even that produces significant change in me.
A lot of people say that they desire stability, something to be constant. I think there is only one unchanging thing: Jesus. Maybe there's another unchanging thing: Jesus' ability and desire to keep changing me. What I'm finding is that while the change often hurts and takes me places that I'd rather not be, I've never been more fully alive than I am right now. And I'm 30. I think that's saying a lot and it's all an act of His grace in my life. So far, I don't mind being 30 and 21 days because I know Jesus better now and have been changed more by Him than I was when I was 30 and 20 days. Getting old used to worry me, and I did pull my groin while playing basketball the day after I turned 30 which made me feel really old, but I don't think there's any better way to know and love Jesus than to just keep being changed by Him as I live my life everyday. And one day I won't be here anymore and I'll know and love Him better than I ever have.
I turned 30 on February 27. To me, 30 was always the threshold of "old". Somewhere, probably in a box in my parent's basement is a list of things I would like have done before I turned 30. I wish I had that list. I made it when I was around 15 and I can remember a few things on it:
1. Get married (accomplished)
2. Travel to Europe (accomplished)
3. Play semi-pro soccer (not accomplished)
4. Be a missionary in a Muslim country (not accomplished, my wife was though)
5. Learn guitar (accomplished)
6. Skydive (not accomplished)
7. Run a business (accomplished)
8. Be published (accomplished)
9. I'm pretty sure that "Meet Alyssa Milano" was on there too (not accomplished)
I realize that the amount of change that has happened in the last fifteen years is hard to fathom. Heck, the amount of change in me in the last six months is hard to fathom. I think that the only thing I am going to put on my list of things to accomplish before I am 40 is to keep changing. One of the major things I've learned is that there is always more to press into, particularly in my relationship with Jesus, Sheri, my kids, my friends and my church. It's a constant changing, a constant moving. Satisfaction is not an option. Stagnation is unacceptable. Resting in Jesus is important, but even that produces significant change in me.
A lot of people say that they desire stability, something to be constant. I think there is only one unchanging thing: Jesus. Maybe there's another unchanging thing: Jesus' ability and desire to keep changing me. What I'm finding is that while the change often hurts and takes me places that I'd rather not be, I've never been more fully alive than I am right now. And I'm 30. I think that's saying a lot and it's all an act of His grace in my life. So far, I don't mind being 30 and 21 days because I know Jesus better now and have been changed more by Him than I was when I was 30 and 20 days. Getting old used to worry me, and I did pull my groin while playing basketball the day after I turned 30 which made me feel really old, but I don't think there's any better way to know and love Jesus than to just keep being changed by Him as I live my life everyday. And one day I won't be here anymore and I'll know and love Him better than I ever have.
Monday, January 15, 2007
Martin Luther King Jr
"Everybody can be great because anybody can serve...you only need a heart full of grace and a soul generated by love." -- Martin Luther King Jr.
"Like an unchecked cancer, hate corrodes the personality and eats away its vital unity. Hate destroys a man's sense of values and his objectivity. It causes him to describe the ugly as beautiful and the beautiful as ugly and to describe the true with the false and the false with the true." -- Martin Luther King Jr.
I deeply respect people who are willing to put their back against a wall and not back down from what they believe. Abraham Lincoln, Martin Luther, Susan B. Anthony, Nelson Mandela, Winston Churchill, Jim and Elizabeth Elliot, Martin Luther King Jr -- all people I admire because of their great courage and strength of heart.
Martin Luther King Jr, Rosa Parks, Frederick Douglas, Medgar Evers, Elizabeth Jennings...all the great civil rights leaders walked down a path that was very much like Jesus. They fought against hatred and bigotry for the cause of justice, love and equality. Situational ethics came very much into play as the question of "Who do I obey -- God or government?" was very real. And many of them died for their cause.
Martin Luther King Jr is a great holiday. We as a nation do well to stop and remember what it is he fought and died for, which in a word, is freedom. There's no more Jesus-like concept than freedom. "It is for freedom Christ set us free." I think MLK would have been great friends with George Washington, Patrick Henry, and Benjamin Franklin. They were all revolutionaries -- and, it seems to me -- he was great friends with Jesus, the greatest Revolutionary of all time.
A Testament of Hope: The Essential Writings and Speeches of Martin Luther King, Jr is a fantastic book.
Friday, January 12, 2007
Troop Surge
I'm not happy about the president's speech on Wednesday night. I think this it is a very unwise move to completely ignore the Iraq Study Group's report as well as the greater portion of the American public (62% at last check). There's a fine line between strong leadership/public servanthood and maniacal stubbornness (maybe it's not that fine at all). I think President Bush is approaching that line.
There is an Old Testament principle that applies here, I think. When a king did not know what to do, he would call for chief counsel: a prophet. It was the prophet's job to go to the Lord on behalf of the king and return with the Word of the Lord for the given situation. When this would go down, the king had better obey the word that the prophet received for him. To not follow it was to invite defeat. I hope that is not what is happening with this situation -- not that the Iraq Study Group is prophetic or anything -- just that the principle seems present.
I read a great quote today: "Mountains appear more lofty and majestic the nearer they are approached. Great leaders resemble this quality not at all." -- Meyers S. Cooper
Thank you for listening to a bit of political rambling on my behalf. I picked this pic up on the Web. It cracked me up. Check out the TV listings on the major networks immediately following Wednesday night's speech.
There is an Old Testament principle that applies here, I think. When a king did not know what to do, he would call for chief counsel: a prophet. It was the prophet's job to go to the Lord on behalf of the king and return with the Word of the Lord for the given situation. When this would go down, the king had better obey the word that the prophet received for him. To not follow it was to invite defeat. I hope that is not what is happening with this situation -- not that the Iraq Study Group is prophetic or anything -- just that the principle seems present.
I read a great quote today: "Mountains appear more lofty and majestic the nearer they are approached. Great leaders resemble this quality not at all." -- Meyers S. Cooper
Thank you for listening to a bit of political rambling on my behalf. I picked this pic up on the Web. It cracked me up. Check out the TV listings on the major networks immediately following Wednesday night's speech.
Thursday, January 04, 2007
Thoughts For The New Year
In my estimation, two words are key for this coming year, both personally and corporately as Cornerstone.
Birth.
Beauty.
This Sunday is Vision Sunday, lots more about Birth then.
So, on to Beauty.
I'm colorblind. Have been my whole life. It makes for interesting situations, particularly in the realm of personal fashion. I can see all the colors a normal person can, I just get them mixed up. I think my parents first learned of my "condition" when I was in the first grade. Color-by-number was not my forte. So I was given one of those colorblind dot tests. If you've never seen one, you can check it out here. I only see a 25. The rest are just dots.
Here's the point: because I'm colorblind, I used to think that beauty on a visual level was something that I could not really get or create. Other vantage points like music, writing, and building stuff were all OK, but never anything like painting, photography or drawing.
There's a fundamental flaw in that mode of thinking into which even non-colorblind people step. It is an assumption that beauty is about anything other than a deeper revelation of who God is and that how I interact with beauty has something to do with whether or not something is beautiful.
Don't get me wrong, beauty is subjective -- but also objective. It is both at the same time.
Beauty is objective because God is the source of beauty. Sin, death and Satan are objectively responsible for ugly. Everything God makes is beautiful, and much of God's beauty is as terrifying and/or dark as it is comforting and/or light. For example: an animal sacrifice system, the ocean, fire, the sun, a lion, wind, dirt, caves, boulders, mountains, a Lion (repetition intended), the human brain, the human body, or His Son being tortured and murdered.
Beauty is subjective because how we interact with it is filtered through the lens of our life narrative. How we were raised, what our key temptations are, personal senses of taste, abuse we have suffered, addictions formed, people we like or dislike -- all of these things can tell us something about a beauty experience we are having.
Here's the thing I love about beauty: I don't believe it can be repressed. I believe that beauty is rooted in the character of God and everything He has made and is making bears His stamp, especially people.
About three weeks ago, I went to see Damien Rice in concert. He's one of my favorite artists. Damien is the most honestly real artist I've ever heard. He sings about torturous situations in his life, in deeply emotional, often dark ways. Every concert he releases himself to be re-tortured again. It was one of the most intense, beautiful concert experiences I've ever had. After his last song, he came out for a three song encore -- and I swear, I felt like he was trying to take the audience to a dark, depressing place and leave us there because he sang three of the darkest songs he's ever written. But he couldn't do it. God's beautiful image in Damien Rice was so strong and so real, that there was only beauty. There obviously was not a full release of the beauty that could be there because there was no Jesus in him, but Jesus was definitely there. And it was beautiful.
So, that was a long way of getting to the point that I think Jesus has a lot of beauty for us to learn and experience in 2007. I am praying God will show us more deeply what it means to worship Him "in the beauty of His holiness".
The picture at the top is the most beautiful thing in my life.
Wednesday, December 20, 2006
Into The Abyss
A stomach in knots reminds him that this is not normal experience for the average Jay. The abyss beneath is intimidating and with tears in his eyes, he willingly places himself in harm's way.
The styrofoam encased in fiberglass becomes thinner and the bend in the board causes him to dig his toes deeper into the gritty sandpaper the closer he gets to the end. Looking down at the water is not the hard part. The hard part is looking around, for no horizon can be seen -- nor is there any support for the board. No pillar on an island with a diving board attached.
Just a board.
In the air.
Hovering high over the water.
In the middle of Nowhere.
He knows there is Somewhere. But to get there means abandoning the board, and to abandon the board means to embrace the abyss. The abyss is dark and scary, and God only knows what is in there waiting to consume him. He assumes he will swim to safety, even though it seems that safety is a figment of his imagination. But to stay on the board is not only to be in the middle of Nowhere, but to go Nowhere. And that is an alternative that is unacceptable.
And so he bends his knees, the board flexes under him and flings him high into the air. At the pinnacle of his extension, just before gravity proves its tenacity, he thinks he just may fly away and escape the abyss. Certainly, he thinks, flying enables one to go Somewhere.
And then he falls.
The watery floor beneath awaits his arrival with iron resolve. His feet hit first -- toes pointed and knees together parting the water without a splash. As he slips beneath the surface, he begins to kick. Surprisingly, he keeps falling further and further as if he is being pulled. Legs straining, fingers clawing, he reaches desperately for the light at the surface that is becoming smaller and smaller like the light at the end of the tunnel before the end of the tunnel can be seen.
The light slips away and he is sure that this is the end, or Nowhere again. The darkness is everywhere, and the abyss is still calling him and drawing him and clawing him. And there is no escape.
And now he must breathe.
And he realizes he can breathe.
And he knows he is in a new world.
And he is born again.
Again.
So this is Somewhere.
The styrofoam encased in fiberglass becomes thinner and the bend in the board causes him to dig his toes deeper into the gritty sandpaper the closer he gets to the end. Looking down at the water is not the hard part. The hard part is looking around, for no horizon can be seen -- nor is there any support for the board. No pillar on an island with a diving board attached.
Just a board.
In the air.
Hovering high over the water.
In the middle of Nowhere.
He knows there is Somewhere. But to get there means abandoning the board, and to abandon the board means to embrace the abyss. The abyss is dark and scary, and God only knows what is in there waiting to consume him. He assumes he will swim to safety, even though it seems that safety is a figment of his imagination. But to stay on the board is not only to be in the middle of Nowhere, but to go Nowhere. And that is an alternative that is unacceptable.
And so he bends his knees, the board flexes under him and flings him high into the air. At the pinnacle of his extension, just before gravity proves its tenacity, he thinks he just may fly away and escape the abyss. Certainly, he thinks, flying enables one to go Somewhere.
And then he falls.
The watery floor beneath awaits his arrival with iron resolve. His feet hit first -- toes pointed and knees together parting the water without a splash. As he slips beneath the surface, he begins to kick. Surprisingly, he keeps falling further and further as if he is being pulled. Legs straining, fingers clawing, he reaches desperately for the light at the surface that is becoming smaller and smaller like the light at the end of the tunnel before the end of the tunnel can be seen.
The light slips away and he is sure that this is the end, or Nowhere again. The darkness is everywhere, and the abyss is still calling him and drawing him and clawing him. And there is no escape.
And now he must breathe.
And he realizes he can breathe.
And he knows he is in a new world.
And he is born again.
Again.
So this is Somewhere.
Sunday, December 10, 2006
John Edward McCumber III
Today is Trey's sixth birthday.
This whole journey I've been on lately with understanding my identity in Jesus as being more than what I do for Him has been most intensely illustrated to me by my relationship with my kids -- especially Trey.
Trey is my namesake, and he is most like me in personality. When I watch him, his reactions, his struggles, his young values -- I see me. When he grows up, he wants to play soccer for the Italian or Irish national teams because the USA sucks at soccer. I swear I didn't put that thought in his head.
Trey and I sometimes butt heads, and when we do it can be rough. My mom has a saying for parenting: "Choose your battles wisely and win every battle you choose." The battles I choose with Trey are often really difficult.
No matter what though, he's my son. He's mine. I see me in him, and that's not pride at all. When Trey scores a goal, that's my boy. When Trey gets his name put on the board at school, that's my boy. While I will obviously react in two different ways in regard to training/discipline in those two situations, there's one thing that doesn't change: he's my son and I love him more than I can say or understand. Nothing he does or is ever changes that fact.
No matter what, I'm God's son. I am his. He has put His nature in me and seeking His own glory through me is not pride at all. When I preach a good sermon, I'm His boy. When I speak in anger to my wife, I'm His boy. While He obviously reacts in two different ways in regard to my training/discipline in those two situations, there's one thing that doesn't change: I'm His son and He loves me more than I can say or understand. Nothing I do or am ever changes that fact.
Happy birthday, Trey. Thank you for teaching me about who I am. You are my son, I am so pleased with you, and I love you more than you will ever know.
Doing As Result Of Being or Being Versus Doing Part Six
Being vs doing was a bad title...too misleading of a generalization.
Doing as result of being is key. To pit the two against one another can be dangerous because what I'm learning is that I do have something to do -- I think of it in terms of the word "calling". I do play a role, a really important role, as I believe every person does.
The problem arises when my calling supercedes my identity. Kept in the proper order and balance, I think Paul can say "I'm an apostle", because as his call, that is what he is doing but it's because of who he is in Jesus. Paul holed up in prison was not able to be very apostle-ish but he was still a son of God and some of his most powerful writings came from that time period.
For me, doing my calling can become an idol so easily as a result of how I learned to think about God and my relationship with Him, that it is almost "being vs doing". And I know that I am not alone in that struggle -- many Christians today deal with the same issue, especially American Christians. Some dark part of me wants to believe that there are things in me that merit the love of God, something to offer that will pay Jesus for what He did for me. And that's just a lie.
"But God demonstrated His own love toward us in that, while we were still sinners, Christ died for us."
Doing as result of being is key. To pit the two against one another can be dangerous because what I'm learning is that I do have something to do -- I think of it in terms of the word "calling". I do play a role, a really important role, as I believe every person does.
The problem arises when my calling supercedes my identity. Kept in the proper order and balance, I think Paul can say "I'm an apostle", because as his call, that is what he is doing but it's because of who he is in Jesus. Paul holed up in prison was not able to be very apostle-ish but he was still a son of God and some of his most powerful writings came from that time period.
For me, doing my calling can become an idol so easily as a result of how I learned to think about God and my relationship with Him, that it is almost "being vs doing". And I know that I am not alone in that struggle -- many Christians today deal with the same issue, especially American Christians. Some dark part of me wants to believe that there are things in me that merit the love of God, something to offer that will pay Jesus for what He did for me. And that's just a lie.
"But God demonstrated His own love toward us in that, while we were still sinners, Christ died for us."
Wednesday, November 01, 2006
Immersion Retreat - October 31
Traveled today from Kauai to Oahu to meet with the leadership at New Hope Fellowship in Honolulu, by far the church that I am most stoked about getting to visit. This morning, we had time to kill before we could check into our hotel, so we went to Pearl Harbor. It was a deeply sad place. The USS Arizona is the centerpiece of the memorial. It was bombed that morning of December 7, 1941 and sank in nine minutes after being hit, killing 1173 of its crew members, 900 of which are still underwater in the Arizona. It is a stark reminder of the sacrifice required for freedom. Freedom isn't free...socially, politically, or spiritually.
"You were bought with a price."
The USS Arizona Memorial in the harbor. To get there, you get on a naval ship from the main building.
The foundation for gun turret three, rusty and sticking out of the water.
A shrine listing all the names of the sailors and marines who were killed aboard the Arizona.
The USS Missouri, the last battleship the US decommissioned after the Gulf War, stationed now in Pearl Harbor as a museum/learning exhibit.
This trip has been a great experience. I've been blogging about the travel aspects, but the spiritual ramifications of the research, learning and community experiences are by far the most intense things of this trip. I'm really thankful to be a part of it.
I really miss my family though. Tomorrow, we spend most of the day with New Hope and then we catch the red eye home! I can't wait to see my wife and kids.
Not wanting to end this post on a totally somber depressing note, here's a picture of Tim's foot.
"You were bought with a price."
The USS Arizona Memorial in the harbor. To get there, you get on a naval ship from the main building.
The foundation for gun turret three, rusty and sticking out of the water.
A shrine listing all the names of the sailors and marines who were killed aboard the Arizona.
The USS Missouri, the last battleship the US decommissioned after the Gulf War, stationed now in Pearl Harbor as a museum/learning exhibit.
This trip has been a great experience. I've been blogging about the travel aspects, but the spiritual ramifications of the research, learning and community experiences are by far the most intense things of this trip. I'm really thankful to be a part of it.
I really miss my family though. Tomorrow, we spend most of the day with New Hope and then we catch the red eye home! I can't wait to see my wife and kids.
Not wanting to end this post on a totally somber depressing note, here's a picture of Tim's foot.
Monday, October 30, 2006
Immersion Retreat -- October 28, 29, 30
October 28
Let me begin this post by again offering congratulations to my friends in St Louis. The World Series win was certainly a great thing, but now, how about achieving the #1 ranking for America's most dangerous city? St Louis beat out Detroit, Compton and Camden! Philly's not even on the list. So I don't want to hear it from any of you St Louis people any more. When I was a youth pastor at Hope, parents would always freak out about being really safe on the overseas mission trips. I always said the most dangerous mission trips we took were to our own city -- guess I was right.
I realized a lot of you that read this weren't at Cornerstone the Sunday before I left for this immersion retreat, so you have no idea why I'm in Texas or Hawaii. I was selected to be a member of a team of six pastors from south-central PA sponsored by a scholarly grant from the Lilly Foundation to research how to lead and perpetuate missional churches and church movements. It is a two-week research project called an "immersion retreat" where we travel across the country and interview leaders who are currently leading missional churches and movements and glean information and principles to formulate a deeper understanding of missional leadership in order to be missional and transformational leaders ourselves. It's a great opportunity with lots of learning and community, and it's obviously sweet being in Hawaii to interview leaders at Kauai Christian Fellowship and New Hope Fellowship.
So, like I said earlier, writing about the full content of all that's going on with the learning side of things would be very unprofitable because it's essentially information overload and I'm going to need to process for a while. But I wanted to include my friends and family on the travel side of things.
A few weeks ago at Cornerstone, I taught John 4 -- Jesus and the Samaritan soman -- had everything to do with living water. I started off that teaching by talking about people who love water and are part fish, like my buddy Tim, he's a surfer dude. I on the other hand, do not like water. It's not that I'm afraid of it cause I'm a relatively strong swimmer. Saturday I went body surfing. This is me before going body surfing.
This is me after going body surfing.
One of the most painful experiences of my life. I was in the water with my friend, Dave and we got wrecked by this huge wave -- 20 feet high! (actually, my buddy Tim on the shore said it was about five feet high, but what does he know?). I lost my body board and ended up getting pounded into the sharp, lava hewn rocks making a huge divot in my leg and depositing large amounts of sand into my bathing suit -- very uncomfortable. I remembered once again why I don't do water: too much work and lots of pain.
October 29
Today was a cool day. Went to Kauai Christian Fellowship and spent the afternoon with its pastor, Rick Bundschuch talking missional leadership and ministry.
Sunday evening consisted of some very cool community time with the guys on the team.
Spiritually invigorating and draining.
October 30
Have some down time today and tomorrow before getting to New Hope Fellowship in Honolulu. So we went hiking today in an incredible canyon in Kauai.
After driving through the canyon, we hiked about one and a half miles back into the canyon to Waipoo Falls. They were intensely beautiful, as is all of Kauai.
Let me begin this post by again offering congratulations to my friends in St Louis. The World Series win was certainly a great thing, but now, how about achieving the #1 ranking for America's most dangerous city? St Louis beat out Detroit, Compton and Camden! Philly's not even on the list. So I don't want to hear it from any of you St Louis people any more. When I was a youth pastor at Hope, parents would always freak out about being really safe on the overseas mission trips. I always said the most dangerous mission trips we took were to our own city -- guess I was right.
I realized a lot of you that read this weren't at Cornerstone the Sunday before I left for this immersion retreat, so you have no idea why I'm in Texas or Hawaii. I was selected to be a member of a team of six pastors from south-central PA sponsored by a scholarly grant from the Lilly Foundation to research how to lead and perpetuate missional churches and church movements. It is a two-week research project called an "immersion retreat" where we travel across the country and interview leaders who are currently leading missional churches and movements and glean information and principles to formulate a deeper understanding of missional leadership in order to be missional and transformational leaders ourselves. It's a great opportunity with lots of learning and community, and it's obviously sweet being in Hawaii to interview leaders at Kauai Christian Fellowship and New Hope Fellowship.
So, like I said earlier, writing about the full content of all that's going on with the learning side of things would be very unprofitable because it's essentially information overload and I'm going to need to process for a while. But I wanted to include my friends and family on the travel side of things.
A few weeks ago at Cornerstone, I taught John 4 -- Jesus and the Samaritan soman -- had everything to do with living water. I started off that teaching by talking about people who love water and are part fish, like my buddy Tim, he's a surfer dude. I on the other hand, do not like water. It's not that I'm afraid of it cause I'm a relatively strong swimmer. Saturday I went body surfing. This is me before going body surfing.
This is me after going body surfing.
One of the most painful experiences of my life. I was in the water with my friend, Dave and we got wrecked by this huge wave -- 20 feet high! (actually, my buddy Tim on the shore said it was about five feet high, but what does he know?). I lost my body board and ended up getting pounded into the sharp, lava hewn rocks making a huge divot in my leg and depositing large amounts of sand into my bathing suit -- very uncomfortable. I remembered once again why I don't do water: too much work and lots of pain.
October 29
Today was a cool day. Went to Kauai Christian Fellowship and spent the afternoon with its pastor, Rick Bundschuch talking missional leadership and ministry.
Sunday evening consisted of some very cool community time with the guys on the team.
Spiritually invigorating and draining.
October 30
Have some down time today and tomorrow before getting to New Hope Fellowship in Honolulu. So we went hiking today in an incredible canyon in Kauai.
After driving through the canyon, we hiked about one and a half miles back into the canyon to Waipoo Falls. They were intensely beautiful, as is all of Kauai.
Saturday, October 28, 2006
Immersion Retreat - October 25, 26, 27
Hey Everyone in blogland.
Let me begin this post by congratulating my St Louis friends on winning the World Series. It couldn't happen to a nicer city and you folks deserve it, especially the way the Rams and Blues have tanked in the last four or five years. St Louis is the greatest baseball town in America.
So, the immersion retreat is going well. On Wednesday morning, we traveled from Corpus Christi to Houston. We spent all Wednesday afternoon at Ecclesia, a church in Montrose -- metro Houston area. It was a really cool experience to talk ministry philosophy and purpose with the guys at Ecclesia. Their church reminds me so much of Cornerstone. Doing great kingdom work.
Wednesday I got a real treat. Mike Taylor is a former student from my youth group at Hope Church in St Louis. Mike went to Moody and is now a youth pastor in Sugar Land, a suburb of Houston. His wedding to his wife, Lacey, was one of the many I was privileged to do this summer. Anyway, I got to spend all night hanging out with Mike and Lacey at their crib. Literally all night -- didn't go to sleep at all. I loved it.
Thursday morning we flew from Houston to San Francisco. San Francisco is another city I love and another location of a wedding I performed this past summer. We had a six hour layover in SanFran, so we took off into the city to hang out in Union Square. Was very cool. Tried to hang out with another former student and intern -- actually, the girl from the SanFran wedding -- but she was working.
Here's a trolley from San Francisco, the home of Rice A Roni, the San Francisco treat, which is the product placement I think of when I think of San Francisco.
Thursday night we flew from San Francisco to Lihue (pronounced Luh-hoo-we), Hawaii on the island of Kauai. This place rules. I've been a lot of beautiful places in the world, and this place is right up there at the top. We are on Kauai to learn from Rick Bundschuh, pastor of Kauai Christian Fellowship a church that started as a youth ministry gone nuts. Kauai is where we'll spend the most solid time block in our trip which is nice cause all this traveling is really taxing, even in Hawaii. So today we were at KCF for a while and then spent the afternoon seeing some of the north shore. Here's some pics from the day.
Tomorrow, we're going on a three hour tour. I may or may not see you all again.
Let me begin this post by congratulating my St Louis friends on winning the World Series. It couldn't happen to a nicer city and you folks deserve it, especially the way the Rams and Blues have tanked in the last four or five years. St Louis is the greatest baseball town in America.
So, the immersion retreat is going well. On Wednesday morning, we traveled from Corpus Christi to Houston. We spent all Wednesday afternoon at Ecclesia, a church in Montrose -- metro Houston area. It was a really cool experience to talk ministry philosophy and purpose with the guys at Ecclesia. Their church reminds me so much of Cornerstone. Doing great kingdom work.
Wednesday I got a real treat. Mike Taylor is a former student from my youth group at Hope Church in St Louis. Mike went to Moody and is now a youth pastor in Sugar Land, a suburb of Houston. His wedding to his wife, Lacey, was one of the many I was privileged to do this summer. Anyway, I got to spend all night hanging out with Mike and Lacey at their crib. Literally all night -- didn't go to sleep at all. I loved it.
Thursday morning we flew from Houston to San Francisco. San Francisco is another city I love and another location of a wedding I performed this past summer. We had a six hour layover in SanFran, so we took off into the city to hang out in Union Square. Was very cool. Tried to hang out with another former student and intern -- actually, the girl from the SanFran wedding -- but she was working.
Here's a trolley from San Francisco, the home of Rice A Roni, the San Francisco treat, which is the product placement I think of when I think of San Francisco.
Thursday night we flew from San Francisco to Lihue (pronounced Luh-hoo-we), Hawaii on the island of Kauai. This place rules. I've been a lot of beautiful places in the world, and this place is right up there at the top. We are on Kauai to learn from Rick Bundschuh, pastor of Kauai Christian Fellowship a church that started as a youth ministry gone nuts. Kauai is where we'll spend the most solid time block in our trip which is nice cause all this traveling is really taxing, even in Hawaii. So today we were at KCF for a while and then spent the afternoon seeing some of the north shore. Here's some pics from the day.
Tomorrow, we're going on a three hour tour. I may or may not see you all again.
Tuesday, October 24, 2006
Immersion Retreat - October 24
Met with Bill Easum today. It was a great meeting. Trying to download any or all of the different meetings we will be in on the spot like this, without processing, is not going to be helpful to anyone. So I'll focus on the travel part.
Here's the other guys on this team I'm on. Most of you know the other dude in the middle...Tim Doering. Left to right of the other dudes you don't know is Rob Eshelman, Dave Ulm, Dave Weiss and Galen Hackman.
I couldn't resist this one...you Napoleon Dynamite fans will love it! Vote for Pedro! And he's a real dude running for a real office!
We toured the USS Lexington, a WWII aircraft carrier that's now in Corpus Christi harbor. It was so cool. Here's a few pics.
The mighty USS Lexington...
That Japanese flag on the tower is the spot where a kamikaze fighter attacked it!
Here's me being tough sailor-dude.
Here's me in the brig. I was so tough it broke a rule of some sort.
I also operated a 50mm cannon. You turn it with your hands and shoot it with your feet.
This is an F14 Tomcat. It is so tough looking and it's what Maverick and Goose flew in Top Gun which is one of my top five movies of all time.
For those of you who were worried about us, we did get all our luggage today, so I was able to change close. Good thing too, cause I think things were starting to get a little pungent.
This evening, we spent some time in our study of the book of Acts and discussion around what it means to re-discover what a New Testament church looks like. The trip has been great so far, thanks for praying for us.
I feel the need...the need for speed.
Here's the other guys on this team I'm on. Most of you know the other dude in the middle...Tim Doering. Left to right of the other dudes you don't know is Rob Eshelman, Dave Ulm, Dave Weiss and Galen Hackman.
I couldn't resist this one...you Napoleon Dynamite fans will love it! Vote for Pedro! And he's a real dude running for a real office!
We toured the USS Lexington, a WWII aircraft carrier that's now in Corpus Christi harbor. It was so cool. Here's a few pics.
The mighty USS Lexington...
That Japanese flag on the tower is the spot where a kamikaze fighter attacked it!
Here's me being tough sailor-dude.
Here's me in the brig. I was so tough it broke a rule of some sort.
I also operated a 50mm cannon. You turn it with your hands and shoot it with your feet.
This is an F14 Tomcat. It is so tough looking and it's what Maverick and Goose flew in Top Gun which is one of my top five movies of all time.
For those of you who were worried about us, we did get all our luggage today, so I was able to change close. Good thing too, cause I think things were starting to get a little pungent.
This evening, we spent some time in our study of the book of Acts and discussion around what it means to re-discover what a New Testament church looks like. The trip has been great so far, thanks for praying for us.
I feel the need...the need for speed.
Immersion Retreat - October 23
So I'm on a study trip funded by the Lilly Foundation to Texas and Hawaii with five other CoB pastors. I know, I know...rough life. I thought I'd keep all you Cornerstoners and other friends up to date with what's going on with a pictorial review of our time together.
Today, we left at 6:00am to fly to Corpus Christi, Texas. Tomorrow we meet with Bill Easum from EasumBandy Associates -- church growth consultants. Texas is a wild place.
Lots of oil.
This is the view from my hotel room.
But Corpus Christi is right on the coast of the Gulf of Mexico and it is beautiful and warm. Looking forward very much to meeting with Bill tomorrow.
Oh, by the way, Delta lost all our bags in Atlanta...all six of us. I'll be wearing the same thing tomorrow that I'm wearing right now, and that's kind of gross.
One more pic...
Today, we left at 6:00am to fly to Corpus Christi, Texas. Tomorrow we meet with Bill Easum from EasumBandy Associates -- church growth consultants. Texas is a wild place.
Lots of oil.
This is the view from my hotel room.
But Corpus Christi is right on the coast of the Gulf of Mexico and it is beautiful and warm. Looking forward very much to meeting with Bill tomorrow.
Oh, by the way, Delta lost all our bags in Atlanta...all six of us. I'll be wearing the same thing tomorrow that I'm wearing right now, and that's kind of gross.
One more pic...
Thursday, October 19, 2006
Being Versus Doing Part Penta
Before you read this post, read the first comment by my buddy Jimmi (aka Joshua) on the last post, Being Versus Doing Part Quatro (yes, he's the guy who compared Anne Lamott to Bruce Springsteen -- please offer him some grace). Jimmi makes some deeply profound points in his thoughts.
The best thing Jimmi says is that the starting point is the cross. I take no exception to this observation and deeply agree with it. How I view the cross is very important and is the starting point for all belief. I jive with all that, to a point.
Jimmi puts it like this:
"I think the point is that it is not us acting out our AM-Devotional Truths by will-power, and it's not us tapping in to our wishy-washy emotions. Instead, it's God grace allowing us to come along for the ride.
So, I guess my argument is that there is a difference in evangelizing, being married, doing funerals and counseling, when your brain is tuned to the “belief” of the all-encompassing grace of God vs. an emotion or passion.
Can the Spirit use passions? Yes. Does He? Yes. But, is that the starting point for our actions? Depending on how we define our words...I'm inclined to say "no". Because our passions should spring from our belief in the cross."
I'm falling back again on my Reformed leanings here, but I don't think that how I view the cross or what I believe about the cross is nearly as important as how the cross views me, because it is in that view that my identity is formed. There's a reason why Jesus died, because He loved me. It is in the reception of that love that my identity is formed and I am made new, not in an act of my will to believe anything (John 1:12).
When I am a new creation in Christ, when God births me again, I become more and more who Jesus made me to be. My identity in Him is concretely made manifest by who I am as I "work out my salvation with fear and trembling (Phillippians 2:12,13)". I'm not ignoring the battle between old man and new man, nor am I advocating a new Gnosticism, but I am saying that I believe that "our spirits bear witness with God's Spirit that we are the children of God born of water and of blood (Romans 8:16)". And that means that what my spirit feels matters and I believe that what my spirit feels comes from a place of deep redemption.
"The Word of God is living and active and sharper than any two-edged sword, and piercing as far as the division of soul and spirit, of both joints and marrow, and able to judge the thoughts and intentions of the heart (Hebrews 4:12)."
There is a difference between soul and spirit. I am still thinking this through, but I'm coming to a belief that the spirit is the place of regeneration where the fullness of my positional, soteriological blessings in Christ are held. The soul, for lack of better terminology, is the place where sanctification begins as a practical outworking of my new identity as my mind, will and emotions are made subject to my redeemed spirit.
And so, the more that I am deeply aware of my identity in Christ in my redeemed spirit, the more I am released to be, feel and know all that Jesus has for me.
I hope the Eagles win on Sunday.
The best thing Jimmi says is that the starting point is the cross. I take no exception to this observation and deeply agree with it. How I view the cross is very important and is the starting point for all belief. I jive with all that, to a point.
Jimmi puts it like this:
"I think the point is that it is not us acting out our AM-Devotional Truths by will-power, and it's not us tapping in to our wishy-washy emotions. Instead, it's God grace allowing us to come along for the ride.
So, I guess my argument is that there is a difference in evangelizing, being married, doing funerals and counseling, when your brain is tuned to the “belief” of the all-encompassing grace of God vs. an emotion or passion.
Can the Spirit use passions? Yes. Does He? Yes. But, is that the starting point for our actions? Depending on how we define our words...I'm inclined to say "no". Because our passions should spring from our belief in the cross."
I'm falling back again on my Reformed leanings here, but I don't think that how I view the cross or what I believe about the cross is nearly as important as how the cross views me, because it is in that view that my identity is formed. There's a reason why Jesus died, because He loved me. It is in the reception of that love that my identity is formed and I am made new, not in an act of my will to believe anything (John 1:12).
When I am a new creation in Christ, when God births me again, I become more and more who Jesus made me to be. My identity in Him is concretely made manifest by who I am as I "work out my salvation with fear and trembling (Phillippians 2:12,13)". I'm not ignoring the battle between old man and new man, nor am I advocating a new Gnosticism, but I am saying that I believe that "our spirits bear witness with God's Spirit that we are the children of God born of water and of blood (Romans 8:16)". And that means that what my spirit feels matters and I believe that what my spirit feels comes from a place of deep redemption.
"The Word of God is living and active and sharper than any two-edged sword, and piercing as far as the division of soul and spirit, of both joints and marrow, and able to judge the thoughts and intentions of the heart (Hebrews 4:12)."
There is a difference between soul and spirit. I am still thinking this through, but I'm coming to a belief that the spirit is the place of regeneration where the fullness of my positional, soteriological blessings in Christ are held. The soul, for lack of better terminology, is the place where sanctification begins as a practical outworking of my new identity as my mind, will and emotions are made subject to my redeemed spirit.
And so, the more that I am deeply aware of my identity in Christ in my redeemed spirit, the more I am released to be, feel and know all that Jesus has for me.
I hope the Eagles win on Sunday.
Tuesday, October 17, 2006
Being Versus Doing Part Quatro
The thing about being vs doing is that it releases me to be who I really am.
Take this weekend, for instance. On Sunday afternoon I led the funeral service of a seventeen year old named Nick who died of an overdose. It was a terrible tragedy.
I don't consider myself to be very good in those situations that require an intense amount of shepherding -- I'm just not a natural shepherd-type person. My pastor in St Louis, Clint, is an awesome shepherd. He really connects with people at those darkest times of their emotional trauma and brings a lot of love and hope.
Do you know what my naturaly reaction is at a funeral? Anger.
Anger because it is not supposed to be this way. I don't know personally if Nick knew Jesus or not. Praise God that his mom says he did. All I know is that here is this beautiful young life with so much potential for the honor and glory that God made it for (Psalm 8), and it is violently ripped from us. This is not how it was suppposed to be. Nick should still be here, skateboarding and dreaming about a souped-up Volkswagen, not lying on his bedroom floor breathing his last breath because of cocaine.
I stood before a packed house at the funeral home...standing room only, mostly teenagers, and the primary emotion in my spirit was anger. But it was righteous anger, it wasn't sin. And because it was right, it didn't come out wrong. I think God used me on Sunday because I was being who God made me to be. If I had tried to change to fit a mold of "doing" like I had seen others doing, or like some class in seminary tries to teach me, I don't think I would have connected with the hearts of the people there.
The point is this...be fully who God made you to be. The thing is, the only way to be that is to deeply engage God intimately so that He can define you on the deepest level. The more superficial your relationship with God, the more you will do instead of be and the more empty you will be in the places you were meant to feel life most deeply.
Take this weekend, for instance. On Sunday afternoon I led the funeral service of a seventeen year old named Nick who died of an overdose. It was a terrible tragedy.
I don't consider myself to be very good in those situations that require an intense amount of shepherding -- I'm just not a natural shepherd-type person. My pastor in St Louis, Clint, is an awesome shepherd. He really connects with people at those darkest times of their emotional trauma and brings a lot of love and hope.
Do you know what my naturaly reaction is at a funeral? Anger.
Anger because it is not supposed to be this way. I don't know personally if Nick knew Jesus or not. Praise God that his mom says he did. All I know is that here is this beautiful young life with so much potential for the honor and glory that God made it for (Psalm 8), and it is violently ripped from us. This is not how it was suppposed to be. Nick should still be here, skateboarding and dreaming about a souped-up Volkswagen, not lying on his bedroom floor breathing his last breath because of cocaine.
I stood before a packed house at the funeral home...standing room only, mostly teenagers, and the primary emotion in my spirit was anger. But it was righteous anger, it wasn't sin. And because it was right, it didn't come out wrong. I think God used me on Sunday because I was being who God made me to be. If I had tried to change to fit a mold of "doing" like I had seen others doing, or like some class in seminary tries to teach me, I don't think I would have connected with the hearts of the people there.
The point is this...be fully who God made you to be. The thing is, the only way to be that is to deeply engage God intimately so that He can define you on the deepest level. The more superficial your relationship with God, the more you will do instead of be and the more empty you will be in the places you were meant to feel life most deeply.
Saturday, October 14, 2006
Saturday, October 07, 2006
Why No Posts? Being Versus Doing Part Tre
It's been a while. To be honest, I've thought a lot about posting in the course of the last three weeks. I've even logged into blogger and written some stuff and then deleted it.
So why no posts?
I have had nothing to give.
September was rough month for me, spiritually speaking. That rough time extended into some of the key relationships in my life and I started doing rather than being. Here's a window into my life: if I miss time with me and Jesus, just for the sake of loving Him and being loved by Him, I lose it spiritually.
One of the weak points about my driven type of nature is that I have an incessant need to work harder in order to fix stuff...even my relationship with Jesus. So when things are rough at home, and people at church are frustrating, and the prayer network has no one coming to pray, and the children's ministry fund is not going well...I know that the key to me staying "on top of things" is to get alone with Jesus and right things spiritually.
And so I do, but only with the intention of getting me "fixed" so that I can get back to doing. And so I do what is right and what I know to do, but there is no heart connection because the relationship is not flowing out of my identity, it's flowing out of my work ethic. I'm using Jesus to fix me -- setting His agenda for Him -- instead of releasing myself completely into Jesus to be born again in Him again (if that sentence didn't make sense, come to Cornerstone Sunday).
So, last week, after much tough love by my wife, I went to spend time with Jesus just to be with Him and receive. And it was life-giving and wonderful. He again established my identity in Him and reminded me that as long as I am His, I have everything I need.
Take the world, give me Jesus.
So why no posts?
I have had nothing to give.
September was rough month for me, spiritually speaking. That rough time extended into some of the key relationships in my life and I started doing rather than being. Here's a window into my life: if I miss time with me and Jesus, just for the sake of loving Him and being loved by Him, I lose it spiritually.
One of the weak points about my driven type of nature is that I have an incessant need to work harder in order to fix stuff...even my relationship with Jesus. So when things are rough at home, and people at church are frustrating, and the prayer network has no one coming to pray, and the children's ministry fund is not going well...I know that the key to me staying "on top of things" is to get alone with Jesus and right things spiritually.
And so I do, but only with the intention of getting me "fixed" so that I can get back to doing. And so I do what is right and what I know to do, but there is no heart connection because the relationship is not flowing out of my identity, it's flowing out of my work ethic. I'm using Jesus to fix me -- setting His agenda for Him -- instead of releasing myself completely into Jesus to be born again in Him again (if that sentence didn't make sense, come to Cornerstone Sunday).
So, last week, after much tough love by my wife, I went to spend time with Jesus just to be with Him and receive. And it was life-giving and wonderful. He again established my identity in Him and reminded me that as long as I am His, I have everything I need.
Take the world, give me Jesus.
Friday, September 15, 2006
Freedom Of Love
It's cool how when I really believe that Jesus loves me and when I see that love concretely in the people I am closest to that I feel truly free.
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